Making a change

As a development professional, what drives me is a desire to be part of positive change. What is typically not clear is ‘how’ and at ‘what level’. There are always multiple answers to these questions and at the end, it is never easy to resolve them conclusively.

I am clearly not satisfied with a role that is only intellectually-stimulating. Realising the gap between what I have learnt from an experience and my ability to use that experience to make a change is often a cause for frustration. On the other hand, at the implementation level, the feeling of being a pawn in the larger scheme of things that are dictated by policy or by the essential need of having to survive as an organisation is probably worse. I have gone through these phases at different times over the last three years. Thus, in spite of having had a fantastic time in terms of lessons learnt, I feel I lack a mission in life, a passion that would be a driving force. For long I have been telling myself that its not really important; that in this sector specially, it is difficult to figure out things this early – but there is a nagging feeling that refuses to die. Having a path in mind could make me so much more productive, for sure!

Higher degrees and good jobs cannot be the goal – neither are money and the luxuries it brings. So then what is? I obviously get asked this question quite often since I am percieved to have made some odd career choices; but no one poses this question more often than me myself…still looking for answers…


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